This post is intended for my benefit – I’m not trying to convince
anyone of anything. These are my thoughts alone, but if you take the
time to read it, whoever you are, I hope that you are inspired in some
way. If you are currently in network marketing, I hope that you are
inspired to continue to build your business, no matter what challenges
or obstacles come your way, no matter what anyone says, knowing that
there are other people who believe in this business model, and who are
willing to risk big to make their dreams a reality. If you are the
spouse, close family member or friend of someone who is pursuing a
network marketing opportunity, I hope that you will suspend your
“rational judgement” for that someone’s benefit, and support them in
their desire, and realize that perhaps your “story” of “no one actually
succeeds at this business” isn’t true. Finally for those of you who may
be desperate in your current employment circumstances I hope that this
post will inspire you to realize that you do have choices, however you
may need to adjust your perspective in order to fully recognize them. I
hope that you develop the courage, over time, to follow your heart.
Recently I made a big decision, one that I have been mulling over for
quite some time, and one that I am finding is turning out to be fairly
controversial with the people in my life who are supposedly “interested
in my welfare”. However, one that feels absolutely right.
I made the decision to leave my law practice (which over the last 4
years I have built from the ground up) to work full time with my wife
Meghann at our direct sales business with Scentsy. Almost three years
ago we joined this company as independent business owners. Our
experience with the company has been tremendous. We now make a
significant income from our business and have grown our organization to
over 1300 people. Our business requires two people full time to run
it, and I know that I am the best person to partner with my wife.
You’d think that despite these factors, building a “stay at home”
business that rivals a lawyer’s salary, being able to live life on our
terms, and contribute, in a real daily way, to over 1300 independent
business owners who are working their best to get their businesses off
the ground, that we (more specifically I) would receive encouragement
and support from people close to us. However this hasn’t been the case,
at least for me. The people within our organization have been excited
and inspired by our announcement. However, many people, outside of our
organization, when I with excitement describe my career change, have
responded with a highly predictable pause, followed by the obligatory
raised eyebrow, followed shortly thereafter with the now entertaining
statement “Oh”. Most people will say, well what are you doing after
that? As don’t I know that any rational person wouldn’t actually
entertain this as a long term objective? (no actually I don’t know
that).
So why am I doing this? There are really only two reasons.
1. I wasn’t happy in my law career. An even better description is
that I was literally depressed on a constant basis doing law. If I had
to do my education all over again I would have done computer science as
an undergrad and business in grad school. However, hindsight is always
20 /20 and the past is the past. I can only be grateful that I found my
path in my early thirties, and for me that path is being an
entrepreneur. I found the legal profession to be wonderfully
uninspiring and lacking in true role models (other than academics). I
found the generally accepted business model to be internally
competitive, not motivating, conflicting with my other core values
(freedom and efficiency) and not innovative. I found clients generally
to be demanding and ungrateful. I absolutely LOVED law school. I had
fantastic professors, who are good friends to this day, and I thrived in
the intellectual environment, but the practice of law has not been the
same way for me. Unfortunately the vast majority of my peers that I have
discussed this topic with feel the same way that I do. Many feel
trapped. Because of fortunate circumstances I have been able to get
out, but I am 100% sure that many of my peers and contemporaries live
what Thoreau describes as “lives of quiet desperation”. There are very
few that are excited and passionate about what they do. There are many
that would leave law if the path was lit, but they don’t know what to
do, and perhaps they feel stuck (more on this to come). I don’t know
why it is this way. I don’t know if it has to do with the nature of the
billing model or the inherent stress in the profession. However, I
ABSOLUTELY KNOW, that there are many young lawyers who are really
struggling emotionally to find meaning in their lives, especially when
upwards of half of their available hours in a week are spent doing
something they don’t love. I know this because many have told me so. So
as it stands, my law degree is now in a box in the basement, and I will
work my butt off to keep it there (more on this to come).
2. I love our Scentsy business, and this is why: my main core
values are freedom and contribution, I get loads of both through our
direct sales business. I can work from home (or anywhere else I want),
with my wife, on my timeline and make a substantial income. I love
working with my wife as a business partner. She has tremendous
intelligence particularly emotionally. She understands what motivates
people. She can connect like no one I have ever seen. She was born to
be a network marketer. Every single day I get to train and teach
independent business owners. I get to contribute in a real way to their
success. I get to add value every single day, and every single day I
get notes of gratitude and appreciation from members of our team. I am
in my element when I am training our team. I was born to teach and
lead. This business gives me the opportunity to do both. I have never
been happier professionally than when I am fully engaged in this
business. I feel that I am most at peace when I am working at this
business. I work into the night, losing track of time, building
training programs and systems for our team. This NEVER happened in law.
I am motivated to overcome my fears, and push myself to the best that
is in me, every single day in this business. This business has not been
a “get rich quick” thing by any stretch of the imagination (more to
come on that in a moment). We have worked our butts of for almost three
years to get to the point where I could leave my job to do this full
time. We have had to face fears, expand our comfort zone and learn new
skills over and over and over. But through all of it we have felt
fulfilled. I love the quote from Howard Roark in one of my favourite
books of all time Ayn Rand’s “The Fountainhead” when he says why he
chose to become an architect: ”You see, I have, let’s say, sixty years
to live. Most of that time will be spent working. I’ve chosen the work
I want to do. If I find no joy in it, then I’m only condemning myself
to sixty years of torture.” I find joy in direct sales, and I am
choosing to work in it.
I’ve often asked myself why people, particularly friends, family and
loved ones hold back their encouragement for the people close to them
who get motivated and join a direct sales company. I believe I have a
number of very valid reasons.
First, there have been way too many people who use lies to promote
their business. They make it seem like it is easier than it really is.
They get people to think that it is a quick path to freedom and riches.
This is a lie. This is unfair to the legitimate people like Meghann
and me who are choosing to do this the right way. This is unfair to the
many people on our team who are working their business each day. This
business takes heart, belief, dedication, passion, persistence and
commitment. AND THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO SUCCEED AT THIS BUSINESS. However
most people’s frame of reference is based on the limited exposure
they’ve had to this industry – the person they knew who was entranced by
the “quick path to riches” that was promised them, and then when it
didn’t come 6-8 months later, get discouraged and quit. Their
experience taints the impression of those around them, and then when a
friend or family member joins a different opportunity at a later date
they are quick to “lovingly inform them” of the “real truth” of this
industry.
The real truth about this industry is that it is the same as any
other industry. The failure rates are the same as any other
entrepreneurial venture. There are people who make millions and there
are people who fail. There are people who take their business very
seriously and work at it with discipline and dedication every day and
over time are able to build something wonderful where they have
financial freedom and tremendous relationships with their downline, and
there are people who basically do nothing other than a few half hearted
efforts, sporadically spaced, and then complain and blame others after 6
months when they aren’t millionaires. This business is an expression
of the law of the harvest. What you sow you reap. We are experiencing
success because we’ve consistently sown for years. Other members of our
team are experiencing success because they work their business each
day. However many people we have signed up have quit over the years and
many struggle because they fail to take action consistently. They fail
to work daily with passion and persistence.
So if your friend or loved one is involved in a direct sales company
the best thing you could do for them is to BE REAL. But you need to
understand that BEING REAL does not mean that you tell them “that no one
actually succeeds and makes money at this”. That is a lie. There are
many people, including us, who are doing great at this business model.
BEING REAL means encouraging their dreams but helping them to
understand, that like any other entrepreneurial venture, this business
requires a ton of hard work, a ton of overcoming fear, a ton of
persistence, a ton of patience, a ton of dedication. But you can
succeed at this business. Please don’t be their dream killer.
Now shifting gears – to those that feel trapped or stuck in their
current situation a couple of thoughts. To be blunt, this is a story in
your head. You could change at any time, any day, if you could muster
the courage. Many of you won’t, here’s why not:
For one, you value far to much what people think of you. You are
absolutely conditioned to be terrified of criticism and failure. You
know what I said earlier about the law degree being in a box – well if I
“fail” at this business and have to dig it out to pay my mortgage or
feed my kids then I WILL BE A VISIBLE FAILURE and will be subject to the
whisperings of those people who have never known failure (which is
absolutely ridiculous, more on that to come). Yes you are right all
knowing pragmatist – IF I FAIL I FAIL VISIBLY.
But my rebut to you is
from the words of Franklin Roosevelt:
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how
the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them
better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,
whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly;
who errs, who comes up short again and again, because there is no
effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do
the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends
himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph
of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails
while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold
and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
I would rather fail, knowing that I gave it my best shot, knowing
that I gave my all to try to do something I wanted to do, than be a
timid soul who doesn’t know victory or defeat.
People are often willing to experiment and “fail” on hobbies and
private interests (ie. trying yoga for the first time, or taking a
painting class) but on their career – no that is WAY TO VISIBLE. They
tie their sense of self-worth to their CV and their current job
description. It is critical for them to have “upward momentum” in their
resume “just in case” their current job doesn’t work out. They forfeit
their happiness because they are living life “just in case”. I did
that for years. The only reason I went into law in the first place was
because I thought it was prestigious and I was insecure (lame) and
because I didn’t know what else to do to feed my family (legitimate,
more on that to come). It is particularly hard for people who spent
many years (and dollars) on their education, to just stop doing it.
They don’t understand the economic principle of “sunk costs”. They
feel like a failure if they disregard their previous decisions and go a
different path. Instead, I choose to follow Emerson’s edict that a
“foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds”. I am an amateur
scientist. I am like a child. I do not know what something will be
like until I try. If I try and I don’t like it then there is nothing
wrong with taking another path.
Emerson’s Essay on Self Reliance has been the source of my mental and
emotional liberation from the chain’s of “what other’s think”. It has
been a beacon for me. The pain of doing something every day that I
hated eventually got so severe that I knew there was no choice but for
me to change. I embraced Emerson’s words that “my life is for itself,
and not for a spectacle. I much prefer that it should be of a lower
strain, so it be genuine and equal, than that it should be glittering
and unsteady.”
When it comes to feeding the family, I appreciate fulfilling these
roles. I will do WHATEVER IT TAKES to feed my family. But honestly,
for many people who live lives of quiet desperation we aren’t really
dealing with issues of “feeding the family”. We are really dealing with
the issue of having to maybe take a step down in the upward projection
of your income so that you can arrange to make your life much more
fulfilling. This is a good trade if you ask me. Why is today’s model
the best model? Why does it matter that we need a better car or a
bigger (mortgaged) house to keep up. I don’t want “property” to own me.
I value my life too much. Why do place so much weight on buying
stuff, to impress people, who don’t even matter? It is crazy to me. I
love what Thoreau said on this topic “The life men praise and regard as
successful is but one kind. Why should we exaggerate any one kind at the
expense of others?”.
For many people who aren’t fulfilled they aren’t dealing with a
“making ends meat” situation. If you are then my advice (for what it’s
worth) is take care of your business, and build your dreams on the side.
But for those who are hating their life, but doing it because of the
fact that they can’t “make the same money elsewhere” I disagree with
your analysis. You will wake up 20 years from now, with loads of money,
and a bunch of regrets. Find the courage now and make that change.
I’m not saying to go join a network marketing company. I’m saying
value your life. It is the only one that you will ever get. Don’t
trade it for some stupid physical possession. It’s not worth it. Trust
your own heart, trust your own mind above all else, not what other
people think or say.
So that is where it stands for me. I wanted to do this post to
clearly articulate to myself, my thoughts on the subject. To my team, I
look forward to giving you the best that I have every single day to
help your business become successful.
